Mini Sock Swap

This sock is mine that I knitted for someone. I need to get it in the mail today so it arrives in time.
I hope she like it as much as I do. I had a great time making it. It is made with Lang Jawool superwash and fluffed up so nice and soft when washed. Knitted with 0 needles I altered a pattern for Little Socks by Beth Brown-Reinsel 1995. The original pattern has three rows of the same fairisle pattern. The next round the colors are alternated and then one more set in the colors I used. I bet it would be adorable in Christmas colors. Chloe's Mum is due with #3 in early May and said she would love a set. I see a little sweater set in the future!

Chloe thought the cute chapstick sock I received from Julie was wonderful!!! We had to wait until she went to sleep to get it back. It also arrived with a bag of M&M's. Thanks Julie. This was a really fun swap.

Chloe did a 'happy dance' when she saw it! I didn't realize I need to rotate the photo before posting but actually it fits her personality this way, lol.

Just joined a new group

I just joined a new group.....knitting 2 socks at once.

Got my yarn out and rolled 2 balls.......found 2 circular needles.

Cast on.

Knit one complete round.

Then stopped to look at my work.

RRRIIIPPP!

Turning over a new leaf and leaving the past behind....

Walnut hulls for to use for dyeing yarn. (above)

I have managed to get some knitting done. The Piggy Mittens and hat are for Chloe. They were a really fun knit. I used Duets DK ( A Swell Yarn Shop) yarn and a 3.25mm needle. The free pattern is by SpillyJane at http://spillyjane.blogspot.com. I am making a pale pink set for Savannah. We really don't have any warm wool winter wear. Texans can get away with acrylic yarn blends but that really won't work here. It is freezing at night now and I have been told it will probably snow around Halloween which is only a week away.

Moved to Washington State
I am making a lot of changes in my life.....moving on and leaving the past hurts and disappointments behind. I moved to Washington State two months ago. To celebrate 'turning over a new leaf' in my life, I have changed the look of this blog and will start posting pictures from the trip tomorrow. It was quite and adventure!!! I am still editing pictures.

Prissy, Cinder, Pickles and I now live in a huge home that we have set up like a duplex. Janna and her family live upstairs, I live downstairs, 5 cats live outside, and a mastaff has a pen with her own shed. Janna has 2 cats.....Roxy and Clover. Above are Cinder, Prissy, Pickles, Roxy and Clover. Clover is sitting in the sunroom where the cats spend the night. That is the last of the tomatoes for this year. They had to be picked before the first freeze but are yummier ripening here than the storebought that are picked green for shipping.

Today I raked the leaves from around the walnut trees and took the hulls off the nuts for dyeing yarn. The walnuts still need to be cleaned better and then will dry out before opening. I have had pecan trees in Texas but these are the first walnuts I have even had. I hope we get some good ones as there were worms in many of the hulls. I've never dyed yarn before but I hope I can learn. I am really excited to think I will have yarn to knit from this year of living in this house. Anyone with experience with walnut dye, please leave me a comment. I can use all the help I can get!!

Bad blogger..............

I can't believe I haven't touched base since July! I didn't think my life was all that busy and it has been so long I can't even remember what had me stop. I do know I spent months knitting for 2008 Christmas and managed to get quite a few things completely for all 8 grandkids.

Today is the happiest, scary ist day. My daughter talked me into signing up for Facebook a week ago. Everyday has brought back people who are in their 20-mostly 30's that were church or school friends of my daughters. It is so much fun to see all of them grown now with children of their own. Then today I saw a name that I held dear 30 years ago. Don and Susan were in the same church as us and lived next door. They became fast friends........we believed the same things, homeschooled........have so many memories. It's nice to have good memories. Since the divorce 20 years ago, I lost touch with all of my friends. All were church friends and since I left the church and my husband....well, we believed that you still love the person but you don't socialize with them so it felt like I lost everyone in my life but my daughters. I had only one friend left. He was an elder and would check on me and the girls. Then, he made an inappropiate statement to me and my responce was that I had just lost my last friend and asked him to leave. A few months later my x married his childhood sweetheart. I had lost my trust in anyone, my friends, my church. I went through years of hard times and so did my daughters. We tried to find another church to go to and looked for years....even after the girls grew up and married. It has been 20 years since that divorce. How do you stop loving someone? God gave me my prayer and we were married but I don't think we were 'made' for each other and finally something happened (2 thing realy) and I came to believe I couldn't trust my hus to keep us safe anymore.

Over these 20 years, I have become a recluse. Once in a while I leave the house once a month but mostly, not at all. I have someone who does the things I need once a week. I did get therapy for 10 and it helped with a lot of issues. I had spent most of our marriage with us getting christian therapy and it didn't really help. I have, at last, come back to having peace in my home, being fine about living alone if that is what God wants for me. I am no longer mad at God. I have a lot of confussion over why God allowed so many tragadies but I may never know why.

Now Facebook is bring these people back into my life. It was nice to update our lives, so to speak but I still feel isolated and afraid. I committed a horrible sin in leaving the church and my husband. Left it all for about 6 months and then decided who I was and what I believe. God was all I had as a child in an abusive home and I know only He kept me alive. I knew he loved me and was my father and trusted Him to take care of me even though I was beaten, cut, sexually abused and never had any positive reinforcement by works or touch. My foster mother made it part of the agreement between her and her husband that we would never be hugged, kissed, praised, or told 'Iloveyou". My father kept that promise until the day he died when he told me 'I love you, sweetheart' . I'm not sure he knew it was me though.

God showed me HE has given me the gift of drawing. It just pours out of me and for years drawing was vital to me. I don't know what to do with it now. I stopped 3 years ago because I knew I was supposed to 'say' something with my art and the way I was emotionally, no one was seeing it but my daughters. I was also angry that all the good I was able to do happened after the divorce....3.87 gpa after 2 years of college and graduating with honors, recognition of my art came..........it all just seemed that is those things aren't shared and appreciated by someone else, it is like yelling in an empty forest. It means nothing. So I stopped drawing.

Well, I'll stop now......this is cruel to unload here. I am just so afraid if I should try a get together with these old friends..........I was told I would never marry and would go to Hell by some.
Oh, what a day...........I am on a rollercoaster of excitement and fear. (That's why I hate rollercoasters)

Enough

Nicer updates next time

Lacy days and lacy nights.......the Prayer Shawl adventure

I have never been successful knitting shawls in lace. I can knit lace on sock cuffs or yokes of DGD's dresses and sweaters but for some reason shawls just escape me. I started a prayer shawl. The pattern to start is the inside area with the triangles. But from there on I kept making mistakes and just kept having to frog back so..................I knowing I could knit the stitches so decided to simplify the pattern myself.

The result is a shield shaped shawl....I used too many increases or shouldn't have increased every other row. Don't have a clue! I love the yarn. I am using one of my favorite sock yarns from Brookside Yarn Studio called Kiwi. The color is 6d. I buy it at Knitting Zone and it is so soft after washing and has a 'fuzz' to the yarn. It is now 'teddy bear' size so I guess I will be frogging back and trying again.

The shawl is a gift for a friend. Growing up without physical or verbal comfort and love, I have a child shaped hole in my heart. As I grow older I realize that nothing I try to place in that hole for comfort brings any lasting healing from child abuse. I guess the two things I missed most were being told 'I love you' and hugs. I knew other kids got them. My brother and I had a game where we would hug or say I love you to our parents so they would have to return the action. Hey, it was better than nothing.

I know my friend went through childhood trama also and I am guessing there just weren't enough hugs. I can't fill up that hole of hers because it is 'child shaped' and nothing but going back to childhood can replace what was missed. Even a hug from that same parent that hurt you doesn't heal the hurt of the little child. (Helps, if sincere....)

When I heard she was making a trip home and was nervious about it and the prayer shawl she was knitting for her mother's gift, I decided to knit a prayer shawl filled with prayer for a good visit. So this shawl is important to me. I wanted her to be able to wrap up in it when she was sad and get a 'hug' from someone who, perhaps, understood. I never thought how long it might take or what trouble I might run into since I am usually a fast, experienced knitter. Boy was I surprized.

So, here I leave you. Stay tuned for the continuing saga of my Prayer Shawl adventure.

Barb

New e-mail address

Just a short note. I bundled my cable, phone and internet......forgot to save the old data!
So now I need any of my friends and relatives who read my blog to send me an e-mail so I can rewrite my contact list. I have the LSSK addi's.....we're so talkative they keep rolling in all day, thank God. Click on profile then e-mail for the Texas Road Runner address. Thanks everyone......more later.
Barb

Fork In The Road

doily turns into blanket..... ....
http://www.alexisla yton.com/ 2008/06/18/ star-blanket/

Always Alice sent this link for a doily pattern that makes a beautiful baby blanket. I posted it today because it really symbolizes how I am feeling right now.

I found out instead of being pre-diabetic, I am now diabetic. Doc gave me a meter and meds and some training and sent me off for a month. I will be attending a class soon for diet and exercise but it hasn't been scheduled.

So today I realized after one day I am at a crossroads. My life as a single person living in seclusion just doesn't match!!!! I pretty much have eaten when I was hungry (breakfast about 2pm.....dinner 8 pm and snack once between and a bowl of cereral before bed) and sleep on my natural schedule: up until 4-6am...sleep until anywhere from 10am to 11am.

One day of tracking with my meter and I can see I need to make a lot of changes. I am to keep a log for the doc and the way I live just doesn't do much to tell him anything. I take the fasting reading when I get up but I don't eat for hours, I'm just not hungry. My meals are healthy but few. Snacks small and healthy until the last 2 months when I had too many sweet. I got chocalate for my swaps and would end up eating them and buying more. And this is where it gets you when you are 57.

So I feel like that doily that now must be a blanket!!!! Hope that makes sense. Frankly, I LIKE the way I sleep and eat (except I was eating too much sweets ). So......

I got online and started educating myself about diabetes...........I AM OVERWHELMED! AND TEARY!! Can't wait until they schedule me for the class. I definately need it!

First goal: reschedule my life......SO IT HAS A SCHEDULE!
2nd first goal: incorporate exercise in my life....
(((((exercise...what is that?....all I do is sit and knit. Yes...all day!!! Every day!!!))))
I walk to the mail box (about 1/2 block) ONCE A WEEK!
I bought a bike, now I need to use it every day and 220lbs isn't a pretty or comfortable sight and embarrassing on a bike.............................................................

Thanks for listening
signed Was a Doily......Now to knit that blanket...boy, this pattern is hard, lol